.it takes work.

Last night I had a dream that I was running really hard to keep up with my friends Jude and Jess (who also happen to be sister track stars).  I can't even remember the entirety of the dream, except that I was physically working so hard.  I woke recalling all the hard workouts, time, & energy it took to be where I was physically before I was pregnant, and I felt overwhelmed.  While reading a friend' s blog the other day, she was relating here own year of weight loss and how hard she has had to fight.  I have nothing but respect and admiration for her, because I know it is not easy!  I laugh sometimes at the things people say to do like...park you car farther away in the parking lot, go for walks, do 25 sit ups a night, or just take the stairs.  Don't get me wrong, these are all great things to do and should be doing, but you're kidding yourself if you think you're going to loose any kind of weight with just these simple habits.  It takes time, discipline, pain, tears, and a lot of patience.
I guess what I'm saying in all of this is that, emotionally there are days when I think about all the work that lies ahead of me after little girl is here, and I want to cry a little because....it's a fight!  I look forward to the fact that I'm already ahead of where I was when I was pregnant with Finn, and that will hopefully make it just a bit easier, but it's still going to take time.  This isn't meant to be a downer about being pregnant with my wonderful baby girl...in fact I feel truly blessed to be pregnant and know that what I'm doing has an even greater purpose then being fit and healthy.  However, I feel completely normal in saying, there are days when I mourn the loss of my pre-pregnancy body.  So what does one do to get through some of the dark days of pregnancy?  You try to make yourself a little less frumpy with something you do have control over.  In my case, get a hair cut.

Ignore the crazy eyes

.24 and some change.

Being productive and pregnant sometimes dont mix together so well.  Yesterday I really felt motivated to get some things done for preparation for fall and of course baby girl.  I went through and sorted all of the clothes we got for her.  It was wonderful to see all the piles of clothes for her,  I was beginning to feel like she was going to be looking more and more like a boy.  However, with all those clothes, there needs to be a place to put them.  That meant going through all the closets and dressers dejunking.  It felt really good to just get rid of so many things we had been holding onto.  I love me a good de-cluttering! I also cleaned a good deal yesterday, and went grocery shopping.  On top of all of that, I got the urge to craft up a project for baby girl.  I was up until past 10 (late in my book...I know lame) finishing the sewing.  I went to bed with my body tired and hurting in all my joints.  Unfortunately, I woke feeling the same way, and Finn has been an ornery cuss on top of my tired soar body.  I was really looking forward to our rainy day, but now I'm not so sure.
Here's baby update!

YOU WILL HAVE TO CLICK ON TO SEE BETTER...SORRY!

.gus.

I'm happy to report that the car searching has come to an end, for we have welcomed the newest member of our little fam.  As I mentioned in the last post on Saturday... it felt like the universe was conspiring against us, what with how demoralizing it was to try and find a car, and then having the money and ID fiasco at the bank.  To add to that, we heard that the vehicle we had been interested in buying had broken down.  Roy proposed that instead of spending the whole check on the car, we should find something a little cheaper and that way have some money to put towards licensing and registering, and then save the rest.  I must admit I broke down a little in my frustration getting angry at Roy for wanting us to drive a piece of crap car (not one of my shining moments).  I looked at ksl for what seemed like the millionth time in the last week, and found a Honda in South Jordan.  I thought, "at least we can go look because it's so close".  I won't go into the entire story, but the guy selling it turned out to be so great (you never know who you might meet when you buy from a private seller), and I felt like he was very honest and upfront about the whole thing.  We ended up buying the car, and I have felt so much better since.  I don't know if I finally came to the conclusion that buying a car is always a risk, and that we will have to take the chance no matter what we buy.  Or that I felt like I could stand driving this car vs. the one we had thought about.  But ultimately, I feel like we found something that we work for us, and we were also able to save some of the money...and that feels nice!

Our new 2001 Honda Passport...GUS

Finn enjoyed getting to know the lay of the car

.the week.

I think I'm to the point that I could identify almost any crossover/van driving down the road at this point.  We've looked at so many cars this past week, that I'm completely burned out, and would probably be satisfied with anything that moved at this point.  I've come to the conclusion that car shopping is only fun if you have the money for the vehicle you want...otherwise you're stuck just looking and not getting.  We actually got a decent payoff for Fran, but we really don't want to have a car payment so we are seriously limited at what we can get (i.e. it won't be our dream car, or even something I'll truly love).  Needless to say I'm just looking forward to having this BUMP in the road out of the way so we can focus on the next one...because there are always more bumps to be had.

Finn has started getting more vocal this week, and has started saying his pleases and thank yous, if not consistently, then at least when he really wants something.  We LOVE bath time, because he is such a hoot in the tub.  He'll get on his belly on blow bubbles and just splash like a mad man. Love!  He's also discovered his sheets have planes, cars, boats, trucks, and his favorite COPTER's on them.  As soon as I turn the light on after he wakes up, he will start tossing his pillow and blanket around so he can point them all out.  I often leave him in there while I put our bedroom in order for the morning, just so I can hear him yell out, "Car, Truck, Plane, boat, & COPTER".  

 

He's also figured out HOT as well.  He will say hot when I put food on his tray, and will blow on it to cool it off.  Yesterday when we got in the hot car, he kept saying hot and blowing.  I guess he was trying to cool it off as well.

I got out yesterday to my moms and finished up my canning session this year with 12 quarts of pears.  Pears our the fruit of choice at our house since Roy and Finn will eat them ALL the time.  It felt good to be standing side by side by my beautiful mother as we peeled and cut the fruit talking about babies, life, and everything else.  These are the moments when I get to understand my mother and her sacrifices better, and I grow to appreciate her even more!

As far as baby M goes, well she is just a movin' like crazy!  Last night she kept me up half the night with all her rolling and jabs.  I can now watch her from the outside as she moves...such a strange sensation.  This past week I started to notice my energy start to slack a bit, but I'm not sure if that's from pregnancy or just all the stress of car shopping...I'm obviously hoping for the latter.  I seem to be hungry all the time lately, which is really frustrating to me.  I want to eat healthy, but fruit and veggies just don't satisfy like carbs and meat.  When I wake up at night with whatever baby is doing to me, I realize right away that my stomach is also growling.  I force myself to just roll over and ignore the hunger pains and wait until morning.  Some days I can't wait to feel normal again.

As a post script to this post...

Just returned from the bank this morning.  I had to cash out the insurance check for a possible car buy tonight.  But don't worry my ID along with the thousands of dollars got stuck in the tube on its way back to me.  I felt so bad for the sweet teller, who had to call corporate and her manager to try and figure out what to do, all with 4 cars in each lane waiting.  She finally sent the money down another tube, where I walked over and signed the receipt.  The guy kept cracking jokes about splitting the cash...although I don't think he was entirely joking.  The ID will have to be fished from the tube, and I'll get it Monday...hopefully!  It feels like it's being harder then it should be to get this all done.

.goodbyes.

I'm just getting around to this, perhaps because I'm still emotional about the whole thing, but life is not all new babies and good times around here as of late.

Last Thursday our little Honda (Fran) too the brunt of a wreck.  As Roy called saying, "happy birthday to me, I got in a wreck".  Fran was no match for the beast of a Ford Taurus, and crumpled!  She did her job and protected Roy who, besides some minor whiplash, escaped unscathed.  When I saw the damage I nearly cried, because I knew in my heart it was a total loss.  My first car Fran, who had just driven past her 100,000 mile mark, and had provided me with reliable transportation for the past 7 years, had suddenly met her maker...the Ford Taurus.

I know it's silly and ridiculous to morn the loss of a car (Roy will agree with you), but I still do.  Just like a person, there are memories linked to her that can't be replaced.  So with frustration and sadness, I start the task of finding a car to replace one that would have served us faithfully for another 10 years.  So long old friend!

.zoo time, and other things I like.

Just put Finn down from a morning of zoo time with his buddy Lilly.  He was pretty stoked, and kept chanting "Lillllly, Lillllly, Lilllly" (he slurs her name and it melts my heart) over and over again.  As he calls Elephants Lilly too, I don't know if he was saying one or both.  Today was the first day all summer that I didn't feel like we were walking on top of every other family in the mountain west at the zoo, and it was slightly less -melt your face off- hot to boot.  All things that qualify for a good morning out.  I think Finn's favorite animals are still the seals and Big Boy the sea lion.  We also got a good view of the polar bear this time around.

It was hard to get a good shot, what with all the children with pressed faces and hands against the glass, but I like this shot of Finn's hair and the polar bears' matching white fur.

As far as other things I'm liking right now...INSTAGRAM.  I know I'm a little late on this trend, but I've been trying to limit all my social media craze, so I hesitated.  I finally decided to check out what all the fuss was about.  I love how I can simply keep track of the little events that take place everyday without feeling like I have to put it all down.  Here are just a couple of my favorite Instagrams that I have taken this past week.

 The other week we ventured out to airport 2 to watch the planes take off and land with Mikey and the Wards.  It was too cute watching these boys point and wave to each plane...not to mention there were tractors there too.  Can you say boy's paradise?

Labor day we took a lovely hike up Big Cottonwood to the "Troll Pond".  It was a perfectly beautiful morning spent with my little family and brother Sean.  Finn enjoyed himself at the pond a little too much and ended up with a face full of mud while throwing rocks.  Dad got a good laugh while I did the hard work of cleaning little man.  We also saw a moose, which Finn kept calling a horsey.

Today is Roy's 29th birthday, the last one before I can call him old like me.  And per Roy's request we are playing it very low key.  He would be totally bugged if I actually threw him a birthday party, so we might just go and get some yummy goodness at the Chocolate tonight and call it good.

.saturdays can be long days.

Friday we received our allotment of peaches for the season.  These peaches are DIVINE...seriously the best peaches I've ever had.  I buy a bushel every year from a friend of my mom's and then set to work preserving all the goodness.  I'm a new hand at all this canning business, so I'm still learning the ropes as it were.  My mom is an old pro, so I have felt in good hands through the years.  This time around I undertook the whole process myself.   After nearly 12 hours of standing in various positions, not to mention being 21 weeks prego, I'm beat.  Roy helped, but kept saying, "this takes a lot of work, why don't you just buy store bought peaches."  To this comment all I said was, "I know it takes a lot of work, but there is something that feels so good about putting your own food away for the winter."  SO even though I'm tired and soar, I feel oh so good!  Through the whole day Finn was a good little soul and entertained himself  (miracle) without too much fuss.  Of course there were intermittent times of wrestling daddy.

Here is a new move he's trying out on daddy

a rare capture of the "cheese".  mostly I just love how he's trying to block the camera with his pudge of a hand.

Only a third of the days canning.  I also tried my hand at a vanilla peach syrup that we tried on our waffles this morning...not too shabby!

After our crazy day, eggs were all I could muster up for dinner.  And while Roy put Finn down for the night, I opened up all the windows to let in the glorious smell and sound of the rain as it pounded outside.  I enjoyed the silence and a good book (since that is what rainy weather is the best for).  The only bad thing was Finn waking at the crack of dawn today for no apparent reason.  Bring on Sunday!